ITT we use DQN as a answering machine (148)

1 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 14:24

NTT MESSENGING SERVICE
NOW PLAYING ALL MESSAGES

2 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 17:25

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 ／　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 ＼
　　　　　　　　　　　 　 　 　 ／　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 ヽ
　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　 /　　　　　　 　 /　　　　　　　 　 　 ,
　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 ,.ィ　 　 ,' ,　　 　 /｜|　i　　 　 　 　 　 i＼
　　　　　　　　　　　　 〈:::{　! 　 ! i.　　,ｲ/　 l |i　i　　 　 　 　 　 l:::::＼　　
　　　　　　　 　 　 　 　 V! :i　　ｉ ﾄ､　ﾅiト､　V ヽﾄ､. ｋ　}:.　 : 　 |::::::::/
　　　　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 | ハ.　Ｎ |厶、　　 　 　 ヽ!ヽﾄ1 .: 　 l::::::/　　　　
　　　　　　　　　　　 　 　 }i　 l　| ,ィ'::;::ヾ　　　 　 ｨ':::;::ヾﾊ! :: 　 |:::/
　　　　　　　　　　　　　 /:::|　 lN《 とし:::}　　　　　{うJ:::} 》 ::　　l;/
　　　　　　　　　　 _r〜ｰ┐l　 iﾊ.` ｰ ''"　　 ,　 　 ｰ'==' ' | ;　　ﾄ､　　　　
　 　 　 　 　 　 ／　 ＞=く:::|　 i| !:.::::.　 　 r==､　　.:.:::.:. /|/ 　 |::::〉
　　　 　 　 　 /　 ／　　／}:ヽ　｢`:､.　　　｛　　｝　　 　 ﾉr1　 ,厶-､ _
.　　　　 　 　 ヽ　　 　 '　 /｀i ﾄ｜　ｉト .　　 ー'　　 , イ:/:/ 匕-:r‐く　＼
　　　　　　　　　＼＿　　　 ｲ ヽＮヽﾄトN＞ - ‐ ' /ﾉiﾉ:i: /⌒ヽ　＼ ＼
　　　　　　　　　　　 ｝　　　 |　　　_,／｢{　　　 　 ﾊ､jイ ,i┘ 　 ヽ
　　　　　　　　 　 　 |　　 　 トr;┬|: : : | |　　　 //: ::＼.{
　　　　　 　 　 　 　 |　　　 卜{　|:::|: : : | l　　 //: : : :://　　　 :-r一''´
　　 　 　 　 　 　 　 |　　 　卜,{　|:::|:: : : l |　//: : : : /'/　 　 　 /￣｝
　 　 　 　 　 　 　 /|　　 　 .Kﾍ!｜::|: : : :ｌ.l//: : : : /;'/　 　 　 /￣ ＼
　　　　　　　　　 /::|　　　　.|::ト{　|::::|: : : //: : : : /:,'/　 　 　 /＼ 　 ﾉ
.　　　　 　 　 　 |: :|　　　　 |:::ト{　|::::|: :://: : : : /,〃　 　 　 /　　 Y
　　　　　　　 　 |: :|　　　　｜::ト{　ー`‐''―‐一勿ﾘ　 　 　 ,ﾊ 　 ,丿

Hey, it's Clara. Last night was amazing. I've never known a guy who could keep going as long as you did, you were like a machine! I can't believe we stayed up until 4 in the morning playing Super Smash Bros. together. If you'd like, I don't have any plans this next weekend...hee hee. Maybe next time...I'll let you be Kirby.

3 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 20:17

BEEP

4 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 20:19

Hey Squeeks, it's, uh, Mark. Hey, Me an' a couple of the guys are heading out to the club tonight. Tall me if you're coming, man. See ya.

5 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 20:19

BEEP

6 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 21:33

Beep.

7 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 22:09

BEEP

8 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5297 22:15

( ﾟ ヮﾟ)
I love mittens

cocks cocks cocks

To my darling Squeeks,

It has come to our attention that several indigents living on your property have been visiting the horrofic site www.4chan.org and eaten dandelions. I would like to register a formal complaint with your customer service office since this is unacceptable. ⊂二二二（ ＾ω＾）二二二⊃ Every tuesday, you showed up at my house with a tube of jelly beans. Then you raped and killed me. I found this highly upsetting. Mildly arousing too, until you killed me. Post deleted by moderator. But this is not the reason for my complaint; as you can see, I am alive and well.

Throughout the known history of economic thought, I have never seen so many angels fly out of the mouth of a man, nor so many knives come out of his forehead to slash and cut at my genitals. Sir, you should be ashamed of your misconduct in this matter. For as long as I have been here, the trains have never run on time and the cheese has always been moldy. This simply will not do. My name is Squeeks and I need something better. coca cocks to you, good sir. Nice "Nice "Nice save"" >>48 But let the truth be told: I love dicks. <ヽ｀∀´> This is a paragraph right nida? Thusly, I have enlisted the help of those pictured above, as size does not truly matter to me. ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Mittens is here! ( ﾟ -ﾟ) We're that close to the end, yet there is still no grandpa.

Love and kisses,
( ´ω`)

9 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 03:30

BEEP

10 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 03:31

（　・∀・） Hey Squeeks? This is Squeeks. I-I-I...I love you.

11 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 03:32

BEEP

12 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 10:53

Heavy breathing

I-I-I-I love you. WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME?!

13 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 15:53

BEEP

14 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 18:41

Uh heya, my name is Jim Bob Luther, and I'm calling about your ad you placed in the paper. You said you're selling a Nissan pick-up? Well I get a question for you: THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM!? Why did you buy a Nissan pick-up when you live in AMERICA!? You don't need no nip nip fong shing dong gong truck! You need a REAL MAN'S TRUCK! A truck that's built FORD TOUGH!

You're selling this thing though, so I guess you're making a start. Best of luck.

15 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 19:24

BEEP

16 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 19:25

Butt plug. HAHAHAHAHA I AM HILARIOUS!

17 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 19:25

BEEP

18 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 20:22

Hello, my name is Janice so please ignore this outrageous Indian accent and answer this simple question please. If you could replace all your posters ABSOLUTELY FREE OF CHARGE, how many would you replace? I'm not trying to sell you anything, we are regulated by the Association of Bangladeshi Carpet Weavers liability limited to up to 10 rupees and this is an opportunity for your family, SQUEEKS. Just imagine how all the other site administrators in SQUEEKSVILLE will envy the SQUEEKS family when they see your OTHER EASIER SITE with all BRAND NEW posters. All our posters are guaranteed meme-free for 10 years, yes, that's 10 years from the date of manufacture (1957) and have been scientifically proved to kill 99% of all known threads DEAD. We use only carefully selected posters guaranteed to be free of da PG kings of any form and our product is endorsed by the Rumanian League of Reasonably Profitable Fair Trade and conforms with the Russian Federation Charter on Environmental Impact and US Human Rights Legislation (where applicable). So if I could ask you to spend just 3 minutes asking some simple questions, starting with your bank account number and mother's maiden name BEEP

19 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5298 21:46

oh sorry wrong number

20 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5299 04:40

BEEP

21 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5299 04:52

beep! STOP ALL THE DOWNLOADIN'!

22 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5299 07:41

BEEP does that beep thing happen all by itself and was I wasting my time writing <EM><I> things? BEEP

23 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5299 07:42

no BEEP

24 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5301 19:16

Hey this is frank I think I left that bag I was looking for at your place. Don't open it up because it full of my dirty laundry. Ok I'll talk to you later

No, I don't think he knows its a dead body full of cocaine.. oh shit the phone is stil...

BEEP

25 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5309 19:43

Hi this is Mittens I left a bag at your house. Don't masturbate into it because it is just cocaine. I'll come and collect it later.

( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I don't think he knows it's really full of my dirty laundry...

BEEP

26 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5309 22:46

BEEP
Okay you idiot, stop saying "speak after the beep". I am not, like you it seems, a stupid dumbfuck. I know how answering machines work. I know when to leave a message on 'em. Hell you know what dipshit? I've got one at home.
I even learned how listen to the messages remotely. That's because unlike you, I happen to have a life and sometimes I leave home for more than a day, but that's no excuse to miss a call.
And anyway you know what? Your sucky-ass machine doesn't make a "beep". Your onomatopoeia is fucking dumb, not only the timbre is way off, but also it's actually an arpeggio of three notes.
Not that I expect you to know, you're such a lazy piece of shit that you probably never took the time to call your own answering machine to make sure it works anyway.

27 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5309 23:01

BEEP
heavy breathing
heavy breathing
heavy breathing

...OOOH GOD!
BEEP

28 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5309 23:03

Is this thing on?

tap tap tap

29 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5310 06:52

BEEP

30 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5310 20:16

BEEP
meep meep!
BEEP

31 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5311 02:40

BEEEP
おやーー、
松本です。
昨日の夜どこだったか？
パーティは楽しかった。
メリーサンは行った。
でもこの女が無理ですね
彼女は俺の部屋で寝たと遣った！
電話をかけてよ
じゃまたね！
奴ら！！
ベイイイップ
BEEEP

32 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5311 09:23

I'm sick of hearing about Candlejack, he wasn't even a fu

BEEP

33 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5311 11:36

[i][b] BEEP [/b][/i]

Hmm, wonder why they never answer. Well honey it looks like we'll have to find someone else to babysit Sarah.

[i]CLICK[/i]

picks up phone a second too late HEY WAIT I'M HERE I CAN DO IT!!!!!!!! HELLO??????

34 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5311 14:29

BEEP
Hey >>33, we don't use bbcode here.

35 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5312 00:52

_*BEEP*_

Hey Squeeks, it's Shii!

I've just finished up those bugfixes for the BBCode Mod to Wakaba for 4-channel! I'm excited! Catch you later!

36 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5312 00:53

BEEP

37 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5312 02:03

BEEP

Hey Squeeks, it's Waha!
Are you free right now? I could use a hand to dispose of a body. Please call back.

38 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5312 02:28

...
BEEP

39 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 00:53

Haha ah ahahaah ahahaha aha hah ha ha
BEEP

40 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 11:13

BEEP

Hey, pick up. I know you're there, answer your damn phone. Quit screening your calls. I CAN SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW, YOU ASSH... owait, wrong number.

41 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 11:37

BEEP

poo in a butt

BEEP

42 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 17:12

BEEP

Hi, this is Laura from the Dominatrix club? I was just returning your call regarding continuation of services. Unfortunately, you have run up quite the tab, sir, and we cannot allow any further services until those debts have been paid, as we explained in the letter we sent earlier. Further delays will result in us contacting your spouse, as well as your employer. We also have videos of you at our establishment, and are prepared to release them. You can reach us at (545) 693-01~ BEEP

43 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 18:34

BEE
bzzzzzzzzzz
bzzzzzzz
bzzzzzzzzzzzzz
.....
..............
bzzzzz
BEE

44 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 20:47

... buzz buzz..? Is that you? I lost the sound stone...

45 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5313 21:06

BEEP

46 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5316 00:10

We are anonymous. We are watching you through the internet. We know who you are. We love the cock.

47 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5316 00:41

日ΕΕＰ

48 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 10:51

Squeeks, this is it. This is Ronny Bidwell, and I'm here to talk to you about the bags of shit you keep throwing on my lawn. It's literally filled with shit, where do you even get this much? Please come and pick them up by next week, thanks.

BEEP

49 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 12:31

BEEP

Oh god how did I get there I am not good with telephone

50 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 16:06

BEEP

51 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 17:25

batteries low

52 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 18:02

BEEP

53 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5317 19:30

BEEP

Congratulations for choosing MAXXXLiFE MyBatteries batteries! Before using your telephone again, please take a few minuts to accept the following end-user license agreement.

1. WAIVER OF LIABILITY
By using MAXXXLiFE MyBatteries batteries, you acknowledge tha......................................
....
.......
batteries low

54 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5319 09:18

BEEP

hi this is tina can DQN come out an play? Me and sophie are at the playground by .... crackle... and ...fizzz...
...

batteries low

55 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5319 21:38

BEEP
Hello this is NTT DOCOMO service and we will be sending you the batteries in 2 to 4 days. Thank you for using DOCOMO NTT WE OWN YOUR SOUL BITCH
BEEP

56 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5325 09:57

BEEP

Hey, I haven't called you in awhile, give me a call back when you get this!

57 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5325 18:33

BEEP

58 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5326 07:56

BEEP

Hello Squeeks,

This is an automated message from Mastercard. We are calling to inform you about some charges that have been made on your credit card. We believe that they do not coincide with previous purchases, and would like to confirm whether or not you indeed made these transactions. If you're identity is stolen, we will waive all of the charges and insist you in any way possible. Please return this call at your convenience. Thanks for sticking with Mastercard.

BEEP

59 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5326 08:42

>>58

BEEP
　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜ Hello automated message. My name is Squeeks and I think you may have meant "assist". Thanks.
　（つ　　 つ　
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　
　（_＿）＿）
BEEP

60 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5326 21:38

BEEP
　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜ Hello automated message. My name is Squeeks and I believe you also meant "your identity". Thanks.
　（つ　　 つ　
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　
　（_＿）＿）
BEEP

61 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5327 07:12

BEEP
DUDE I AM SO FUCKED UP AND I AM DRIVING. I LOVE DRUGSSSSS!!
DEEP

62 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5327 10:34

PLEASE LEAVE A MASSAGE AFTER THE BEEP

BEEEP

Hello person calling me san, boku no here right now so call me again later onegai

63 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5335 04:32

BEEP
Hey its Ryoko. Sorry I didn't call but I just don't think this
is working out. I mean those things you did with my sister and
the dog just freaks me out. Don't call me anymore by the way. I
love you. Bye! :D
BEEP

64 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5335 07:25

BEEP
DUUUUUUR!

DQN
BEEP

65 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5335 15:15

BEEP
Oh.. hi. Thought you were there..
I don't know if this is the right time, but...

Well, the truth is... that I... I can't stand the way you treat me. I'm sick and tired of you disrespecting me!
[sobs]

No, wait! I don't want to hang up like this. Oh God, I'm a mess... I'm regretting this now. Forget what I said. I love you, I just - just... just can't get a hang on why you always pick on me when we're with friends... I feel hurt -
[loud noise]

Oh.
Oh My GOD. What the - what the fuck is this noise? You... you there? Hey, please... you ok? tell me you're OK... oh... oh God... what the fuck is this? It's... running towards me... OH GOD IT'S HORRIBLE SOMETHING IS LICKING THE DOOR - IT'S FULL OF... WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE? OH GOD HE'S COMING IN!
[thud]

OH GOD PLEASE HELP ME! YOU THERE? CALL SOMEONE! PLEASE HELP ME! IT'S COMING! OH MY GOD - LET ME GO - LET ME GO, DAMMIT - NO! AAAAGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHH

BEEP

66 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5336 15:10

BEEP

67 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5336 15:18

Anyways, Squeeks, please listen to me. It's not really related to this thread, but hear me out anyways. I left a message on an answering machine a while ago; you know, an answering machine? Well anyways there were an insane number
of messages on it. Then, I listened to your message, and it said "Please leave a message after the beep."

Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't leave a stupid, rambling message just because he asks you to. Leaving a message is only a suggestion, a SUGGESTED COURSE OF ACTION, for crying out loud.

There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out to leave a fancy answering machine message, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna leave an extra-long message." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll leave a message for you if you just hang up.
Yoshinoya should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped telephone can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start leaving an awesome message, and then the bastard beside me goes "BEEP."
Who in the world says “beep” nowadays, you moron? I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to leave a message that just says “beep?” I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "BEEP"?
Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, the Shakespearean quote.
That's right, the Shakespearean quote. This is the vet's way of leaving a phone message.
A Shakespearean quote means quoting an excerpt from the bard for your telephone message. But on the other hand the meaning of your message is a tad obscured. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you leave this message then there is danger that you'll be marked by the operators from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, Squeeks, should just stick with your name and phone number.

68 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5337 09:50

BEEP
Hello this is Dr. J and I am calling to remind you of your
psychological evaluation appointment for your son Lee. This is
mandatory in order to allow him to come back to public school.
I will be seeing you at 8am on Monday April 14th. Thank you.
BEEP

69 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5337 10:06

BEEP

.....Hello? Shit...I hate these things. Look....I've already deposited the money into your account. Half now, half later. I hope your rep is as good as I heard. I need that coup completed in FIVE WEEKS! I've got a lot riding on this. You are free to assemble any team you wish and TRY not to destroy the palace.....I plan on living there after the coup is complete. Anyways....is it true what they say about you and the doll?

BEEP

70 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5337 17:29

BEEP

Hi....it's me....remember? Look....umm...I wanted to say this in person but...uh...

you might want to get tested

BEEP

71 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5339 01:01

OH MY GOD WHY!? NOOO!!
BOOM

BEEP

Hey, this is your mother. I have some good news for you.
I finally got enough money to pay for your college expensies.
Give me a call when you can. I love you. Bye.

BEEP

72 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5346 20:54

BEEP

I'M BEING ANALLY ASSRAPED BY A TENTACAL MONSTER! HAAAAAAAAAAALP! AAAAAH AHH

BEEP

73 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5346 23:43

BEEP
Dude, but what if we DID find that shit, dawg?
BEEP

74 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5347 06:39

BEEP

YOU'RE A DEAD MAN

BEEP

75 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5347 15:54

BEEP

Hey Squeeks, this is DJ CLONEPA, just wondering when the next DQN ELECTRONICS project is, I hope I can help as much as I did last time!

BEEP

76 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5347 18:33

BEEP

Squeeks here. Your jazz is da shit DJ C.

BEEP

77 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5347 20:37

beep

I came. ohhh.

beep

78 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5348 08:33

BEEP
Hey Clonepa, Squeeks here. Sorry I missed your call. Where did the first eight go, anyway?
BEEP

79 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5348 18:31

BEEP

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 /＼＿＿_／ヽ　　　　　　　　　　
　　　 (.｀ヽ(｀＞、　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　／''''''　　　'''''':::::　 hello im DADDYCOOL and if you pay me enough
　　 　 `'＜｀ゝr'ﾌ＼　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　＋　 | （●）,　　､（●）､.:|　＋I will give you access to a secret area of the
　 ⊂ｺ二Lﾌ^´　 ノ, ／⌒)　　　　　　 　　　　　　.　　　　|　 　,,,ﾉ(､_, )ヽ､,,　::|　 first 8 DQN ELECTRONICS volumes ;)
　　⊂l二L7_　/　-ゝ-')´　　　　　　　　 　　　　　　　.+　|　　 ｀-=ﾆ=- '　.::::::|　+　.　　　　
　　　　　　 ＼_　　､__,.ｲ＼　　　　　　　　　　　＋　　　　 ＼　　 ｀ﾆﾆ´　 .::／　　　　+　
　　　　　　　　(T＿_ノ　　 Tヽ　　　　　　　 , -r'⌒!￣ `":::7ヽ.｀- ､　　　./|　　.　
　　　　　　　　　ヽ¬.　　　/　ﾉ`ｰ-､ﾍ<ｰ1´|　 ヽ　| :::::::::::::ﾄ、 ＼　(　../ ヽ　　

BEEP

80 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5348 23:52

BEEP
( ´ω`) Junior, help me get up
BEEP
( ´ω`) Juniorrr
BEEP
( ´ω`) Junior wipe my ass
BEEP
( ´ω`) Junior stop taking my stash
BEEP
( ´ω`) JUNIOR
BEEP
( ´ω NIGGER´ωS) NIGGERS NIGGERS )´ωNIGGERS NIGGE´ωRS NIGGERS NI´(ωGGERS) NIGGER´ωS) NIGGERS NIGGERS )´ωNIGGERS NIGGE´ωRS NIGGERS NI´(ωGGERS)

81 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5351 09:33

BEEP
Hey man where are you? You are late for work.
That's it man you are fired..
BEEP

82 Name: A Panda : 1993-09-5351 17:05

BEEP
I did not have sexual relations with that woman, however I did leave a message after the beep
*BEEP

83 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5352 01:11

BEEP
Hey, this is opportunity calling. Guessed I missed ya.
Oh well, later
BEEP

84 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5352 03:27

BLAP

I'M YIFFING SALLY, SO LEAVE ME ALONE

BLAP

85 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5352 06:22

>>79
Fucking telemarketer had the balls to leave a message on my machine...

86 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5352 13:37

FAP
　　 ∧＿∧　
　　 （　´Д｀） 　Hello I heard you had interest in presidents and quality please vote me ;)
　　／　　　 ＼　
　　|　l　　 　l　| 　　　 ..,. ., .,
　　|　|　　　 | |｡.::：゜｡-.;.:゜｡:.:;。
　　ヽ ＼_　.｡'ﾟ/　　　`｡:､｀；゜:;.::.｡:.:。　
　　 /＼_ﾝ∩ｿ＼　　　 ::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.::.。.｡:.　　
.　 /　 /`ｰ'ｰ'＼ ＼　　゜: ::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，｡:.:.
　〈 　く　　　　　/　/　::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，.:.:.:｡:.:，
.　 ＼　L　　　./　/　＿::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，.:.:，.:.:.:，
FAP

87 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5356 00:25

BEEP
You kicked my fucking dog!
BEEP

88 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5356 01:19

BEEP
I...
I fucked..
I fucked your kicking dog.
BEEP

89 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5356 11:13

>>88
BEEP
uh....
Fuck, I'm not gonna follow that one BARF

beep

90 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5356 17:28

BEEP

how are you gentlemen

BEEP

91 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5357 10:14

BEEP

LETS GET TO 1000GET

BEEP

92 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5357 14:00

BEEP

...beep!

BEEP

93 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5357 21:15

beep
Hala bubla?
beep

94 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 04:55

beep

[20:53] <drwho> you should
[20:53] <drwho> meet a bar slut
[20:53] <drwho> get a std
[20:53] <prxs> hellyeah
[20:53] <Bored_Rice> lol
[20:53] <consistentlyinconsistent> The American way.
[20:53] <Bored_Rice> sounds fun
[20:53] <Trantez> I'm going to probably find some akward nobody girl that's work related and bang her until I screw up and make a baby.
[20:53] <prxs> bars suck
[20:54] <Trantez> ... You know, that doesn't sound so bad actually.
[20:54] <Bored_Rice> get liad while your still in skool

beep

95 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 07:26

beep

Great site. Thank you!

beep

96 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 07:26

beep

.. Over 200 A-Z medications to choose from ..

We give you FreeViagraPills (Free you 12 pills with any order)

. ViagraPill
. Cialix Pills
. PenisGrowth Pack
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. & 400 more meds to choose from

Claim your Free 12 ViagraPills here with us

http://kfiw.zhbidto.com

beep

97 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 15:15

beep

I like Konata because she is a otaku like me, except she has friends. Oh god I wish I had friends too ;_;

Konata also likes videogames and she is kawaii. And there are lesbians in the show and that's good because I like lesbians and I will never have a girlfriend. Why am I such a loser?!

Konata is like my dreamgirl she has a :3 face I love that. She is also nice why aren't real girls nice!? I got dumped a lot of times but I love konata and she wouldn't dump me because she's so nice and cool.

We would play videogames all day and watch Naruto and other cool animes on TV, and I would have sex with her because sex is so good. I wish I could have sex with a girl.

beep

98 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 15:44

BEEP

Yo DQN Kun, hey nigga, I uhh ... I got me some fine ass ASCII bitches and ... well, I'm going to fuck them.

So looks like I can't make it to your shitty little party with clonepa, peace.

BEEP

99 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5359 23:00

BEEP

Hey this is Rei, did you stop by my house and clean up while I was not there again? I don't want you doing that anymore and stay the fuck away from me you asshole

BEEP

100 Name: A Panda : 1993-09-5359 23:52

BEEP

100GET

BEEP

101 Name: ( 0 ヮ0) : 1993-09-5360 01:44

BEEP

Hey DQN, it's me, the Fail. Yeah, I'm just hanging out, startin shitty threads, you know, the usual.

If ya wanna talk, you can just check the front page. I'm usually hangin out there.

BEEP

102 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5372 14:22

<BEEP>

Hello, this is NTT MESSENGING SERVICE and we will be cutting you off today. You haven't paid any of the bills in days. Thank you for using our service. お休み GOODBYE!

</BEEP>

103 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5373 20:36

BEEP

Never visit http://tinyurl.com/6zkfqj

BEEP

104 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5380 20:40

<BEEP>

Hello, this is NTT again and thank you for your payment. Your account has been upgraded to 1K GET Members Only account. Enjoy Your new messenger service! HOLLA BACK!

</BEEP>

105 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5380 23:45

BEEP

Shadow's been stalking me. The last time I saw him, he was dressed in drag! What the fuck?!

*BEEP

106 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5380 23:57

>>103
NEVER POST THAT FUCKING LINK EVER AGAIN

107 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5381 00:05

>>106 http://tinyurl.com/6zkfqj

108 Name: BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS : 1993-09-5381 02:29

BEEP

Hello, this is Duke. I heard your line was tapped so i will speak in code.
33 2 8 7777 44 444 8 2 66 3 3 444 33

BEEP

109 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5381 10:21

BEEP

Your answering machine produces two beeps between each message. Have you ever wondered what mysteries lies between them? Well, don't. If you entertain the question for more than 33 seconds, then the next night, at 3:33:33, you will die.

You know what's coming next...

BEEP

110 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5381 20:41

>>107
DON'T! FUCK YOU

111 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5382 00:22

BEEP
Hi, uh, Squeeks, this is #6. I met you at the, um, at the Yoshinoya tonight. I just called to say that I had a great time... and you should call me tomorrow, or in two days, whatever. Anyway, my number is 376-555-5382-BEEP

BEEP
Hi, Squeeks, this is #6 again. I just called cuz it sounded like your machine might've cut me off when I, before I finished leaving my number. Anyway, uh, and, y'know, and also, sorry to call so late, but you were still at the Yoshinoya when I left so I knew I'd get your machine. Anyhow, uh, my number's 37-BEEP

BEEP
376-555-5382. That's it. I just wanna leave my number. I didn't want you to think I was weird or desperate, or... we should just hang out and see where it goes cuz it's nice and, y'know, no expectations. Ok? Thanks a lot. Bye bye.BEEP

BEEP
I just got out of a 2190 day relationship, Ok? That should help explain why I'm acting so weird. I just wanted you to know that. It's not you, it's me. I'm sorry... This is #6.BEEP

BEEP
Hi, Squeeks, this is #6. Could you just call me when you get in? I'm gonna be up for awhile and I'd just rather speak to you in person instead of trying to fit it all into-BEEP - Fuck!

BEEP
Uh, Squeeks? #6. It's uh, uh, it's just, uh, this just isn't working out. I think you're great, but maybe we should just take some time off from each other. It's not you, it's me. It's what I'm going through, alright? It's uh... it's only been 2190

*click*

（ ・-・） Number Six?

（　・∀・）Squeeks? Great! Did you just walk in or were you listening all along?

（ ・-・） Don't ever call me again.

*click*

（　・∀・）Wow. I guess you're home.

112 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5383 18:19

BEEP

Great. Shadow's threatening to assrape me. Help.

BEEP

113 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5384 17:09

BEEP

Hi, this is John from Morgan Mittens International. We've received an order for one million sets of mittens by someone using the name "security kitten." Can you please call us back to follow up on this? Our number's 1-800-MITTENS.

Thank you for your interest.

CLICK
BEEP

114 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5388 01:51

BEEP

OH GOD SHADOW'S FUCKING ASSRAPING ME HALP! AHHN AHHHHN!

BEEP

115 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5388 06:01

BEEP

Squeeks, I'm afraid we will have remove the "Emergency Mittens" button, as we cannot continue supplying it with more mittens. People are selfishly using this button for their own personal gain, and we can no longer afford to continue this service.

BEEP

116 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5414 05:19

BEEP

ehhrg. ohh...

Fuck you Squeeks, now hes thinking of marrying me. t t

BEEP

117 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5414 09:19

BEEP
Hey, are you coming into work today?
You haven't been in for a week..
I miss you...
BEEP

118 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5417 06:44

BEEP
Wake up Neo.

Neo?
BEEP

119 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5422 00:45

BEEP

Hi this message is for your administrator.

Your shipment of 1000 bamboo sticks has just arrived, we'll be holding them until Monday, if you want to pick them up just come by at the usual time, ok thanks.

BEEP

120 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5422 00:49

BEEP

This is a collect call from
(long pause...)

KANEDDAAA!!

If you would like to accept this call, please press 1...

BEEP

121 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5424 00:35

BEEP

TETSUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

BEEP

122 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5424 09:08

BEEP

beep beep beep beep tooootooo tweet

hehe

BEEP

123 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5424 13:09

BEEP

Go to hell

BEEP----------> PONG

124 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5424 13:44

BEEP

what the fuck do you think you're doing not wearing a condom

you're going to get her pregnant i swBEEP

125 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5425 02:56

beep
just testing, don't mind me
beep

126 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5425 03:46

Beep
Snake? Snake?
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--Beep

127 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5431 03:53

BEEP

Squeeks, I left the emergency mittens on all night on accident and they're everywhere now. Give me a call, I know you know how to fix this.

BEEP

128 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5431 15:47

Beep

Attack on US is imminent! Prepare to taste our new Shahab 8 missiles! WARGHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Beep

129 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5431 15:49

Beep

Oh yes......oh yes....YESSSSSS!!!!

Beep

130 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5431 15:51

Beep

This your god calling. I didn't see you at Vatican, wat u doin??

Beep

131 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5431 15:52

Beep

Gojira......gojira.....gojiraaaaa......argh.....

Beep

132 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5432 07:50

Beep

free cool ringtones!

Beep

133 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5435 10:00

BEEP
Hi, this is day care and we still have your kids here.
Its been two days.
We are calling child services.
LEARN TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS BITCH
BEEP

134 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5435 14:48

BEEP

I don't think I can make it. I'm dying you have to save

BEEP

135 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5435 17:07

BEEP

get a bigger Pen 15 2Day!

BEEP

136 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5436 02:24

BEEP

AMERICA

BEEP

137 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5436 08:33

BEEP

RUCKY CHANNERU!!!!

OAHARAYAKI ^^^!!!!

BEEP

138 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5436 08:35

BEEP

YOU SUX! (has a children laugh at background)

BEEP

139 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5436 11:43

BEEP

Hi, it's your neighbor, Mr. Wallington.
Would you please put curtains on your window because we see you naked in your living room every morning and it's disturbing.

BEEP

140 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5443 16:44

BEEP

(in all seriousness) We may need you to play twing-twang.

BEEP

141 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5446 13:51

BEEP

Oh god! We didn't think it was possible for something of this magnitude to be achieved! I... Wait, what is it doing? It's coming straight for us! Squeeks! Sqqueee-

click

Hello? Oh, the noise? I was just... uh... playing Doom 4.
Does your brain taste good?
I mean, well, you know what I mean! Just jokes and all!

BEEP

142 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5960 11:57

YEAH!

143 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7542 22:44

BEEP

144 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-7542 22:46


　　　　　| ＼
　　　　　|Д｀)　　　Nobody answering?
　　　　　|⊂　　　　　I can dance!
　　　　　|

　　　　　♪　　☆
　　　♪　　　／ ＼　　　 RANTA TAN
　　　　　　ヽ(´Д｀;)ﾉ 　　RANTA TAN
　　 　 　　　 (　 へ) 　　　RANTA RANTA
　 　 　 　 　　く 　　　　　　TAN

　　　♪　　　　☆
　　　　　♪　／ ＼　　　RANTA RANTA
　　　　　　ヽ（;´Д｀）ﾉ　　RANTA TAN
　　 　 　　　 (へ　 ) 　　　RANTA TANTA
　 　 　 　 　　　　 >　　　　TAN

145 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-8102 19:45

BEEP

Lucky prize is waiting you. Call 00 33 1 78 56 95 60 to us give prize you !

BEEP

146 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-8102 22:59

BEEP

I know you're there. Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.
...

BEEP

147 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-8394 06:01

BEEP

Hi grandma it's (*ﾟーﾟ), just calling to see how you're doing. Did you still want me to come over saturday and help you spread mulch? Call me back when you get a chance, love you!

BEEP

148 Name: (*ﾟーﾟ) : 1993-09-8394 10:23

BEEP

--AYDAY MAYDAY WE ARE GOING DOWN OH GOD TELL MY WAIFU I LOVE H--

BEEP

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