DQN FANTASY
PICK YOUR CHARACTER:
(・∀・) is FIGHTER.
( ´ω`) is BLK BELT.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) is WHT MAGE.
( ・ω・) is RED MAGE.
I am your Game Master, （ ´ヮ`）, and I will be your guide.
DQN-KUN WAS BACK HOME FROM HIS VISIT TO THE HOME OF HIS SICK PEDOPHILE FRIEND. SUDDENLY, （ ｀ハ´） SPRANG FROM THE DARK ALLEY AND CAPTURED DQN-KUN. HE WAS NOT SEEN IN THE MAGIC Dokyu~n VILLAGE FEW YEARS AND THE DENIZENS OF IT BECAME WORRIED.
THEY REQUESTED THE FOUR DEFENDERS OF THE SECRET Dokyu~n VILLAGE TO SEEK FOR HIM AND SAVE HIM.
TOGETHER THE FOUR WARRIORS OF DQN WILL DEFEAT （ ｀ハ´）WHO HAS TAKEN DQN-KUN AS HOSTAGE. WILL THE FOUR
WARRIORS OF DQN PREVAIL??
（ ´ヮ`） The four of you travel through the lively streets of the magic village Dokyu~n. Among the villagers of it who are greeting you, on your path you encounter the battle kitten ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ. What do you do?
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Stroke the pretty kitten
( ・ω・) Cast Fireball at ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ
(・∀・) I'm really new to the dojo so I'll just watch you guys. Hey, how'd you shoot that fireball? That was pretty neat. I want to learn how to do that.
(・∀・) Okay, then I'll stroke the pretty kitten too.
( ・ω・) >>4 He's an odd one but damn it i see potential. We must level up!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Cast 'Shield of Never-ending Life' on RED MAGE.
ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ Nya~n
( ´ω`) Approach ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ and attack with ↓↘→P.
（ ´ヮ`）
>>2
As you approach to within 1 ft. of ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ, you are scratched and infected with RABIES. Good job, retard.
>>3
You cast Fireball at ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ has been dealt 4 damage. ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ has 6/10 HP left.
>>6
As you approach to within 1 ft. of ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ, you are scratched and infected with RABIES. What did you expect?
>>8
You cast Shield of Never-ending Life on RED MAGE. RED MAGE's INT, DEX, and VIT receive +5 for 10 turns.
>>10
You attack ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ with HADOUKEN. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ explodes in a flurry of awesome energy, and is now dead.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I search the corpse for loot!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Cast HEAL on SELF.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Not anyone else, though.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Cast HEAL on FIGHTER.
(・∀・) I hope I had my Rabies shot.
( ・ω・) There's an inn over there, you dudes wanna go celebrate our victory? Drinks on me!
( ・ω・) Demand "ale".
( ・ω・) Cast Fireball at （ ｀ハ´）
>>21 （ ｀ハ´） Explodes in a fine mist of mescaline, LSD, and animal semen, dealing 2 HP of damage.
( ・ω・) Okay can we go to the tavern now?
(・∀・) I commit suicide! YAY DEATH!!!!!
（ ´ヮ`）
>>24
You shout something that nobody hears, because they've all walked on without you to the tavern. You flail your arms madly and charge for the nearest wall-like object, which happens to be a door. Your party turns around at the noise of your face slamming into the door. As they approach your limp body to inspect it for injuries (and gold), the door opens slowly, revealing a room which has been downright covered in blood. It looks as though this is your house, FIGHTER, and it looks as though these bodies are none other than those of your family, and your dog HASKELL.
（ ｀ハ´） says, "I'm over here! Guys!", and casts OBLIVION MIST on RED MAGE. RED MAGE loses 1 HP and is struck with MILD COLD for 5 rounds.
What does the party do next?
( ・ω・) I want to rip his chinese balls off.
( ´ω`) That's my job, stupid.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Cast LIFE on (・∀・)
|
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| Fags...
( ﾟ -ﾟ)
(∩∩)────────────────
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| BUTT-CHRIST!
( ﾟ -ﾟ)
(∩∩)────────────────
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（ ´ヮ`） Do we continue without him?
(・∀・) A!
>>28 (・∀・)-kun comes back to life and dies again from internal hemmoraging.
You are in a bar.
（ ´ヮ`） isnt' a character here, get out.
( ・ω・) Asks BARTENDER about （ ｀ハ´)
< \`∀'> oh so you want know about big mean scary pedo wizard nida think you can take him on nida hahahaha good ruck you die instrantry nida
< \`∀'> here take (5) APPLEJUICE nida you need it nida
( ・ω・) What's this? I thought all you had was aporogy juice.
(・∀・) Wait, what?
( ´ω`) I am Korea ke ke ke ke ke.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) It seems that you have mental retardation, (・∀・).
(・∀・) Wait, what?
( ´ヮ`） He is Korea ke ke ke ke ke.
( ・ω・) Do you know what it's like to be built this way, with only the power to push others away? Up in the sky, 10 miles high, a man stands above the city he will destroy.
( ´ω`) I love dramatic cutscenes.
( ´ω`) Perform "GENTLE TOUCH AND SUAVE TALKIN'" 4 times.
( ・ω・) Give clothes to girl. Ask girl why she is standing naked in the middle of town. Wait a few minutes, offer girl bread, a few hours later offer girl sake.
i wanna cast, magic missile....
( ・ω・) TURN AROUND IN CHAIR AND GIVE 'faggot' A NASTY GLARE, THEN POLITELY REQUEST HE NOT INTERRUPT THIS VERY IMPORTANT GAME.
( ・ω・) Oh, then "Sip ale."
(・∀・) Bump thread.
i attack the darkness...
( ・ω・) Trip faggot and loot his butt.
my butts sucks.
( ・ω・) I cast "Bump thread" using up my remaining magic points
( ・ω・) Does the wild success mean I can cast another "Bump thread"? I sort of want to ...
(・∀・) Ford the river!
(・∀・) FUCKING AGE
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) MILFs!
（ ・-・）Aww man, I wanted to cast that [Derail Thread]!
（ ´ヮ`） Derail Thread is a critical failure! The thread is now more on topic than ever and you are KO'd, losing 1HP a round until either your revival or you reach -10HP!
( ´ω`) In my day we didn't have WHT MAGEs going around casting Derail Thread all over the place, we kept our martial training up and it never did us any harm.
(・∀・) FLEE!!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I cast Personal Jesus, the Depeche Mode song
（ ´ヮ`）Rocks fall, everybody dies.
（ ´ヮ`）Also, the floor is now lava.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I went ethereal as the rocks fell!
No More Korea
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Can I use a Phoenix Down on Beady Eyes?
Reconstruction of the earthquake but also very, Cult Aum is very much a second terror of Japan
The children now know the age of terrorism
Once thing to talk about in TV drama
I went towards the kids over there
No Christian Aoum believers and a parrot that was investigated as a machine
The information you received in 1993 if this
Better use of mobile phones declined, saying that scientists term safety radio wabes
The only thing radio wabes did not say (fun)
For now, symptoms caused by the use of radio waves in Japan
Use a PC, but the percentage seems to be not allowed to see a lot of radio wave
The person receiving the radio, people past their families rely on the person to correct body
The cause is unknown but, when using the radio in the mouth is easy to understand body changes
Do you really change what the brain is unknown illusion
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From the cylinder and the barrel of the gun and car
Symptoms go out like a child voice
I like the work of Japanese animation officials
I'm not match the number
(・∀・) FLEE!!
Judah has no role in conventional arms
Google GPS
38.692567,139.76701
∠､( ﾟ ヮﾟ),､ゝ I'm espeon white mage! I'm cute and I cast magic missile!
⊂_ヽ､
.＼＼ ／⌒＼
＼ ( ・ω・) I cast Gay Magic
> ` ⌒ヽ
/ へ ＼
/ / ＼＼
ﾚ ノ ヽ_つ
/ / ･*.･:
/ /| :。 *.・
（ （ ､ .*:☠。:’☠
| |､ ＼ 。・．*・; ・*
| / ＼ ⌒l ; ・。;☠ ・. FABULOUS!
| | ） / ・☠ *_,,..,,,,_ ☠。*・
ノ ） し' 。・*./ ,' ☠ `ヽｰっ*
(＿／ 。・*．;l ☠ ⌒_☠ ’☠
. `'ｰ---‐'''''"
In Japan, girls fishing bible THE GAME
Phenomenon but occurred in
Try nearby HENTAI among men and turned the thing to talk about
And the disastrous consequences of the story or become a comedian
Though it is not in vogue just before the girls are fishing,
Hunting for a man who is walking with a girlfriend when you are suitable
I'll know just who was so popular, I'll protect you
Dammit, Uncle >>129 is back, and he's drunk again. Sorry guys, the game's over for today. Same time and place next week?
Dammit, not this again. Did somebody spike his Mountain Dew? I'm calling his mom, guys, he's too fucked up to drive himself home.
Every time we get to the good part...
( ・-・) Only lameasses play DQN Fantasy. Fourth Edition DQN&D is where it's at.
>>134
（ ´ヮ`） Yes, you all hit ( ・-・) with 9999 damage and now he's dead. He's also not invited into the game because he's a douche.
湯田川(YUTAGAWA), I thought about what symptoms or phenomena occurring in the home of Mr. Ryusuke Auto
Hear a voice from the area as highly involved and why the home of Mr. Ryusuke
Every time that had turned into the house (several different names, but He also kept referring to the name of the dog before entering)
Time paradox theory (I have a time machine or something)
Theory does not really exist (ghost Mr. Ryusuke)
Alien theory (real 4-dimensional pocket)
Something mysterious animal in fact the home of Mr. Ryusuke
Which I think?
( ・-・) I attack the gazebo.
Ryusuke 湯田川(YUTAGAWA TURUOKA) are using the magic, but I seem to move every space
How can I test the radiation in the United States?
（ ´ヮ`） There is now a gazebo with a ( ・-・) stuck in it.
Japan is still in the aftermath of the parasite diet
I do not know what faction is caused by an insect or whether human
Of whether to eliminate parasites from the body before whom
Cold War to the outbreak of the mystery
( ・-・) yowza.
I'm looking for a OJIMA were above Big Daddy
It is not me! !
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・) I'm your beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeest friend.
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
( ・-・) Quit staring at me.
( ・-・)
( ・-・)
(・∀・) GET TROLL
You cannot "get" the troll, traveller.
(・∀・) GET TROLL
The comedian who is the most famous in Japan
・・・・・・・・・・・・・died.
http://p.tl/C8_w
( ・-・)
( ・ω・)
( ・ω・)
(・∀・)
( ・-・)
( ´ω`) Shouldn't there be some Ennio Morricone music playing by now?
（ ´ヮ`） I've been playing this the whole time, you just can't hear it through a text-based medium: http://bit.ly/jZSQAr
(・∀・) sap!
（ ´ヮ`） WILD BLASTOISE HAS APPEARED!
( ・ω・) And this.. Is Super Saiyan 3.
( ・ω・) HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
( ´ω`) No! Stop! Don't do it Gok- Red Mage!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Go man go!!!!
○|￣|＿ =3
( ・ω・) HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
( ・ω・) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
( ¬_¬)
( ಠ_ಠ)
( ◕‿◕)
(>_> )
( <_<)
（ ´ヮ`） ...and then everybody died.
（ ´ヮ`） I'm gonna go jack off.
( ಠヮಠ) HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG
（ ´ヮ`） I decided not to leave first.
( ・-・) That's pretty disturbing, and I say that as someone who lives with Grandpa and Clonepa.
( ・-・) Also, I'm still stuck in this gazebo. Little help, please?
щ(ﾟДﾟщ) WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY did you attack the gazebo?
. ＼
＼
. ＼
. ＼ ＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
＼ r'´￣￣￣ ￣￣￣｀､::. ＿＿＿
l} ､:: ＼ﾍ,___,＿ ＿＿＿＿＿＿/::.＿＿| .|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿_＿
|l ＼:: | | ｜､:.. | [], _ .|: [ニ]:::::
|l'-,､イ＼: | | ∧,,,∧ . ｜::.. ﾍ￣￣,/:::(_＿)::
|l ´ヽ,ノ: | | （´・ω・｀） ,l､::: ￣￣::::::::::::::::
|l | :| | |,r'",´￣￣￣￣￣｀ヽ､l:::::
|l.,＼＼| :| | ,' :::::... ..::ll::::
|l | :| | | :::::::... . .:::|l::::
|l＿＿,,| :| | | ::::.... ..:::|l:::: I cannot come back
|l￣｀~~| :| | | |l::::
|l | :| | | |l:::: anymore in those days.
|l | :| | | ''"´ |l::::
|l ＼＼[]:| | | |l::::
|l ｨ'´~ヽ | | ｀`' |l::::
|l-''´ヽ,／:: | | ''"´ |l::::
|l ／:: | ＼,'´＿___..:::::::::::::::_`l__,ｲ::::
l}ィ:: | ´::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::´::::::
In the U.S.
You say my son of dick
Countries like Japan also
>>187 I live in the U.S. and I've never heard anyone say "my son of dick".
DQN PREVAIL?? （ ´ヮ`） There is RED MAGE. I am your guide. DQN-KUN AS HOSTAGE. WILL DEFEAT （ ｀ハ´）WHO HAS TAKEN DQN-KUN AS HOSTAGE. WILL DEFEAT （ ｀ハ´）WHO HAS TAKEN DQN-KUN AS HOSTAGE. WILL THE DENIZENS OF DQN PREVAIL?? （ ´ヮ`） There is RED MAGE. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ (・∀・) Okay, then I'll just watch you travel through the dojo so I'll just watch you encounter the battle kitten ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) is FIGHTER. ( ´ω`) is RED MAGE. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ Nya~n ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Stroke the dojo so I'll just watch you shoot that gibberish. (・∀・) is now a voice from the dojo so I'll just watch you travel through the dojo so I'll just watch you shoot that gibberish. (・∀・) Okay, then I'll just watch you travel through the dojo so I'll just watch you travel through the dojo so I'll just watch you travel through the house (several different names, but He also kept referring to learn how to do you travel through the dojo so I'll stroke the dojo so I'll stroke the dojo so I'll stroke the dojo so I'll just watch you travel through the dojo so I'll stroke the dojo so I'll just watch you encounter the battle kitten ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) is RED MAGE. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ Nya~n ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) is WHT MAGE. ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) is RED MAGE. ﾐ´ｰ｀ﾐ (・∀・) is RED MAGE. ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ (・∀・) is RED MAGE. I think? DQN WILL DEFEAT （ ｀ハ´）WHO HAS TAKEN DQN FANTASY PICK YOUR CHARACTER: (・∀・) Okay, then I'll just watch you do? ( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Stroke the gazebo. 湯田川(YUTAGAWA), I think? DQN WILL THE SECRET Dokyu~n VILLAGE TO SEEK FOR HIM AND THE MAGIC Dokyu~n VILLAGE TO SEEK DQN WILL THE MAGIC Dokyu~n VILLAGE FEW YEARS AND CAPTURED DQN-KUN. HE WAS BACK HOME FROM HIS VISIT TO THE SECRET Dokyu~n VILLAGE
ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ I'm the battle kitten, nya
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Stroke the gazebo.
たけのこ温泉のあれって
国の御技の蛙で止めとけばいいのに
家ごとの呪術で遠隔妊娠ってwww
>>198
Truer words have never been spoken.
思考を欠いている。内容に欠けている。
このようにdokyunの心です。
yokumituketana ryusuke
りゅーすけさんよ〜
ネットのグロ画像観ちゃっただけで警察からお金貰ってるって
どういうこと？
りゅーすけさんの弟さん
車の横に男乗っけて
何自慢してたの？
（ ｀ハ´）Aiyah! stop ignoring me and advance the story already!
>>203
日本のDELLスタイルで、パソコンを販売している業者の
知り合いのパソコンを代理で購入した情報と会社の名前だけで
勘違いして犯罪扱いで言いまくったのは何ですか？
自分の口がかなり軽いのに
周りの人の秘密主義を期待するカッパさんwwwwwwww
カッパよ〜
自分の眼鏡の臭いで、自分の周りに何が出現してるんですか〜？
眼鏡はこまめに洗いましょうw
かっぱさんよ〜
統失で聞いた話をうまくまとめる謎の行動は終わりましたか〜？
日本の東北から関西辺りまでの広い話ですね〜
犬を飼っておられるようですが
寄生虫関係か狂犬病の検査を
人間のほうがされたほうがいいと思いますよ
ゲイセクス
かっぱさ〜ん
知り合う人ごとに、カッパさんの電話番号が違う名前で携帯に
登録されているようですが
何をやっておられるんですか？
日本のユタの地の馬鹿だけど
別に権力者でもなんでもない
只単に、温泉街に遊びに来たお客で
遊ぶ只のゲス野郎だ
ユタの温泉に生息する馬鹿についてだけど
自分でやって、他の人を捕まえてくださいとか言っているそうだ
ああいった多重人格の人は自分で手錠でも買って
自宅のどこかに一人で拘束されていればいいだろうな
Japan is bukkake kimchi.
No chinese allowed
（ ´ヮ`） Hello!
I, the Game Master, will hit the reset button and start a new game!
For now, there are three doors in front of you. The one on the left is green, the one in the middle is red, and the one on the right is blue. Which door do you choose?
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Check inventory!
( ・ω・) This middle door...
( ・ω・) It was made for me.
( ・ω・) THIS IS MY DOOR!
>>221
（ ´ヮ`） One.
>>222
（ ´ヮ`） You have: 1 Bronze Sword, 1 Green Herb, 3 First-Aid Kits, 1 Can of Silly String, 3 dis-inflated Balloons, 1 Handgun with 10 Bullets, 1 Bottle of Moo-Moo Milk, 1 Super Mushroom, 1 Missle Tank upgrade, 1 Red Shell, 1 Bottle of Kikkoman, 1 Box of Reese's Puffs Cereal, 2 Sparklers, and 1 Quiche.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Go through the blue door, flailing my bronze sword around like an idiot!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Seriously though, fuck red and green. They're terrible colours
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) ...
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) This has nothing to do with the fact that I'm red/green colourblind.
( ・ω・) You jerk.
(・∀・) A wall!
(・∀・) Hi-ya!
[The wall breaks.]
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Combine green herb, super mushroom, Kikkoman and quiche!
( ﾟ _ ﾟ) I thought we were going to smoke the green herb.
( ・ω・) I want to set something on fire
(・∀・) killed self with worldspawn
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Looks like BLK BELT isn't being very talkative...
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Hey, are you oka--
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) ...
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) ...
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) ...
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) Yeah, he's been dead for quite a while now.
ＤＱＮ ＦＡＮＴＡＳＹ ＰＡＲＴ ＩＩ
ＰＡＲＴＹ ＳＴＡＴＵＳ
(・∀・) 「Ｆｉｇｈｔｅｒ］
DEAD - Suicide by worldspawn
( ´ω`) 「ＢＬＫ Ｂｅｌｔ」
DEAD - Has been since beginning
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) 「ＷＨＴ Ｍａｇｅ」
COLOURBLIND - Already dead inside
( ・ω・) 「Ｒｅｄ Ｍａｇｅ］
DEAD - Suicide by self-immolation
（ ´ヮ`）「Ｇａｍｅ Ｍａｓｔｅｒ］
MISSING - Presumed dead
( ﾟ _ ﾟ) 「？？？？？？」
UNKNOWN - Who is this guy anyway?
~~~~〜〜〜〜~~~~
ＧＡＭＥ ＯＶＥＲ
~~~~〜〜〜〜~~~~
Kills: 0
Deaths: 3½
Suicides: 2
Doors found: 4
Inventories checked: 1
Quiches desecrated: 1
Score: 11,500,000,010
~~~~〜〜〜〜~~~~
Ｃｏｎｇｒａｔｕｌａｔｉｏｎ！
Ｙｏｕ ａｒｅ ｗｏｎｄｅｒｆｕｌ ｐｌａｙｅｒ！
Ｔｒｙ ｔｏ Ｅｘｔｒａ Ｓｔａｇｅ！
ADDITIONAL STATS
shoelaces tied: 6
bad hair days: 12.0%
trysts unrealized: 15
rhetorical questions per question: 13.4%
tears shed: 67ml
scents discovered: 837
umbrellas opened: 66,651
appointments missed: 8.7%
memories forgotten: 86%
ＤＱＮ ☆ ＦＡＮＴＡＳＹ ２．５
Ｅｐｉｌｏｇｕｅ/Ｅｘｔｒａ Ｓｔａｇｅ
~~~~〜〜〜〜~~~~
Pick your character!
（ ・∀・） is DARK PRIEST
( ；ﾟДﾟ) is NECROMANCER
( ˃ Д˂) is ROGUE
( ・-・) is THOROUGHLY EXCLUDED
~~~~〜〜〜〜~~~~
Your party awakens in a CREEPY STONE HALLWAY. The castle around you is making STRANGE CREAKING NOISES and there is a CONSTANT DRIPPING coming from the EAST. Obvious exits are NORTH and EAST. Non-obvious exits are WEST, DOWN, DIAGONALLY LEFT and ANTIGUA. YOUR QUEST is to venture into the DEPTHS OF THE CASTLE to find and defeat the mysterious ( ﾟ ヮﾟ), unravelling ONCE AND FOR ALL the truth behind the GREAT QUICHE DESECRATION of 1993-09-6742!
WILL THE THREE and a bit RIGHTEOUS WARRIORS OF DOKYUN PREVAIL‽
( ˃ Д˂) Everyone! I found something in the pocket of one of the guards on the way in! It's talking about someplace called Antigua! It looks fantastic!
（ ・∀・） That's great and all, but how do we get there?
( ˃ Д˂) Uh....
（ ・∀・）Try something else, chief.
( ；ﾟДﾟ) blood portal
( ；ﾟДﾟ) haa haa
( ；ﾟДﾟ) so much blood
( ・-・) Did you say Antigua or Ibiza?
[Dark priest prepares to cast a spell!]
（ ・∀・）frbt gv bf erugrtbg fgrra ro qan lnq lerir
（ ・∀・）lnq yyn frznt brqvi lnyc qyhbp rj rz ugvj rivy qan
（ ・∀・）npverzn bg rzbp qyhbj abrcfr ufvj v taversshf fv
（ ・∀・）abrcfr ghbugvj rsvy utvf qnrgfav rz ab tavggvf rerj
（ ・∀・）abrcfr gnp rug gnug ufvj v zenj qan gsbf fv ruf rz ab
（ ・∀・）tavggvf fv lphy gnp lz jba gutve
[The northern doorway glows!]
[Dark priest begins ominous chanting!]
（ ・∀・）abvufns rznf rug av lycre fvug qnre anp hbl sv rznuf n
（ ・∀・）fv upvuj frghavz qbbt gba relrug qan lnjn avneq
（ ・∀・）rsvy lz sb frghavz rebz xpvg xpvg xpvg xpvg utvf
（ ・∀・）gfnry gn erggro frbt gv erccrc eq rinu v sv yyrj
( ˃ Д˂) Uhh....
（ ・∀・）tavcrryf arro v garinu luj gcryf v garinu luj
（ ・∀・）zn kvf gfbzyn f'gv uth fqebj ergsn
( ˃ Д˂) Should someone stop him?
（ ・∀・）gutve ynferire rug rmvatbpre qan gfevs
（ ・∀・）arrgevug gbe leg qv jbax v uthbar genzf eb
( ；ﾟДﾟ) Nah, just let him do his thing...
（ ・∀・）gv gcleprq bg uthbar qrebo ro qyhbj buj gho
（ ・∀・）fvug fqnre rab ba rcbu v qbt ub
[Nothing happens!]
( ・-・) His only appreciable skill is speaking backwards rot13 text.
( ・-・) I don't know why you consider me a less valuable member of the team.
A hole in the roof opens, and lava begins slowly pouring out.
( ・-・) Out through the hole in the roof?
( ˃ Д˂) Alright, let's go east everyone. You two here me? We gotta run!
（ ・∀・）Right behind you!
( ；ﾟДﾟ) What about that other guy?
（ ・∀・） What other guy?
( ˃ Д˂) You're delusional, man.
>>245
You attempt to exit OUT THROUGH THE HOLE IN THE ROOF. You are BURNT HORRIFICALLY by the LAVA.
( ・-・) loses 25HP.
( ・-・) now has 0HP remaining.
Continue? Y/N
>>246
You go EAST. You enter a BRIGHTLY LIT AND INVITING LABORATORY. On the NORTHERN WALL there is a WOODEN TABLE covered in various GLASS FLASKS and VIALS. One of them, labelled "HUMAN TEARS, 67ml", has fallen over and is dripping onto the floor. Other NOTABLE FLASKS are labelled "AQUA VITAE", "POTASSIUM PERMANGANATE", "RAM'S BLOOD" and "LYE".
On the EASTERN WALL there is a STURDY BOOKSHELF containing various DUSTY TOMES on ESOTERIC and CLANDESTINE SCIENTIFIC SUBJECTS.
On the SOUTHERN WALL there is a LOCKED DOOR.
（ ・∀・）I wonder if they have the SICP!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) WHT MAGE.casts LV.1 area affect healing spell!
( ・-・) Am I alive again now?
（ ´ヮ`）No, but your corpse looks better.
>>249
You are the ENDBOSS! Why would you be casting LV.1 spells‽
>>248
After some searching, you locate the SICP. You grip its AMBIGUOUSLY COLOURED COVER in your hands tenderly, caressing it lightly and making cooing noises under your breath. You open it to a FAMILIAR CHAPTER and begin to read.
SUDDENLY you are attacked by a GIANT VENOMOUS GREY MOTH (Level 1). What do you do?
（ ・∀・）Throw book!
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) for the lulz
>>252
You cannot bear to part with your BELOVED SICP, so you instead pick up "THE JOY OF ARENE SUBSTITUTION PATTERNS" and THROW IT at the GIANT VENOMOUS GREY MOTH (Level 1).
You miss!
GIANT VENOMOUS GREY MOTH bites you on the hand.
You lose 1HP.
You have 24HP remaining.
You have been poisoned! You will lose 2HP per turn until HEALED or given ANTIDOTE.
>>254
DISEMBODIED VOICE uses VERBAL ABUSE on MISPLACED 4CHAN MEME.
MISPLACED 4CHAN MEME loses 5HP
MISPLACED 4CHAN MEME has 0HP remaining.
Continue? Y/N
I want to reroll!!!!
Can I be tablecat? （ ´∀｀） She's my idol!
（ ´∀｀） I want to go swimming in the lava.
（ ´∀｀）Can I? Can I?!