>>0 gets an honorary mention in nearly all ITT threads relating to the previous poster, despite never making a single contribution of his own.
>>362 can accurately predict the winner of previously recorded sports events
>>363 was born with the complete memory of his mother's life up to the point that he was born
When >>364 gets stung by a bee, his skin looks like he was stung by multiple bees.
>>365 can summon swarms of bees at will but they only sting him
>>366 is invisible and unhearable for 5 minutes after breaking any bone in his body
>>367 can convince anyone that she has superpowers, even though she doesn't.
>>369 can type at up to 140 words per minute only using his toes
>>370 can completely and permanently erase himself from existence at will.
>>377 can bring drawings to life, but only if they're drawings of flightless birds done entirely with 9XXB pencils.
>>379 can tell apart Heliconius melpomene and Heliconius erato from a kilometre away with perfect accuracy.
>>380 Knows how many factories are making awful products in China with an accuracy of +/- 5%.
>>382 causes pandas to spontaneously combust upon making eye contact with them.
>>384 emits a strong but nonspecific aura of shame and regret at all times.
>>385 can stop bullets with the power of his mind, but only ones aimed at his left foot.
>>386 can draw create artisic masterpieces, when drawing onto a mahogany desk with a pink crayon.
When >>387 photographs cats and uploads them to the internet, they are 20% more stupid than the average cat photo.
>>388 can insert spurious words in others' sentences so they look like resemble an editing mistake.
>>390 can use any computer's keyboard as if it were Dvorak-style.
>>391
Can give perfect advice to anyone who'll stubbornly refuse to listen to it.
>>392 can punch holes in paper using a stapler and staple paper together using a hole punch.
>>394 gains superhuman strength for 10 minutes when he sees a swan for the first time each year. It must be a real swan.
>>395 Can determine how much regular people will like a movie based on how much negative press the New York Times gives it.
>>396 can read people's minds, but only if they're thinking in a language he doesn't understand.
>>398 Always leaves skidmarks in the toilet when he takes a crap.
>>399 changes the channel of any TV he's watching every time he blinks.
>>402 can ask for extra green onion without being noticed by the cashier.
>>403 can walk at the exact speed of an alligator snapping turtle.
>>404
automatically knows the ending of any movie he's never seen before
>>405 gains five minutes of clairvoyance every time one of his limbs is amputated.
>>406 can predict if the person they're talking to is about to make a bad pun
>>407 can see through stained glass as though it was clear glass.
>>413 can pass any scholastic examination by learning the answers ahead of time.
>>414 has unbreakable blood. His skin and his blood vessels are normal, though.
>>415 farts noxious gas when somebody tries to grab him into a choke-hold.
>>416 can tell the exact day and time a carbonated beverage was canned
>>417 can tell the ingredients of shit, as long as it is between 3 and 4 weeks old.
>>418 fills his lungs with twice the carcinogens that a normal smoker fills their lungs with.
>>419 can accelerate plant growth by staring at it unblinking.
>>422 can manipulate the weak nuclear force in an area 1" around himself.
>>424 Can detect the most microscopic type of microaggression.
>>425 has the power to kill anybody he wants without getting caught as long as they are on their deathbed.
>>428 can use a dial-up internet connection and make a phone call on the same phone line at the same time
>>429 can infect himself with any deadly disease just by thinking about it.
>>430 can instantly calculate the number of anuses in any given space.
>>431 can predict whenever dubs will appear in a thread, though he never is the one to actually get the dubs.
>>434 can tell whether a food or drink is fairtrade or not by taste alone.
>>435 can lift all the crumbs from the carpet, but cannot transport them.
>>437 can sleep for days at a time, and still be tired when they wake up
>>439 can orient any USB cable the right way without looking 60% of the time.
>>442 can summon newborn puppies and make them do his bidding.
>>443 Can make a skunk spray its deadly odor without making it angry first.
>>444 can eat sewing needles without experiencing any adverse effects.
>>445 has the power to reserve a seat at any fast food restaurant, but only past 8 pm
>>449 can mimic the sound of a woodpecker by clicking his teeth together extremely fast.
>>450 can make predictions that are guaranteed to be wrong most of the time.
When walking barefoot on sand, >>451's footprints glow in the dark.
>>452 has a powerful gravitational field that only affects bird shit in a 50 yard radius
>>455 can perfectly aim rifles, if the scope is mounted the wrong way
>>456 can temporarily forget his own crippling loneliness for up to thirty seconds at a time.
>>457 can control all the dust bunnies inside his room at will.
>>458 can make a generation of dumb single moms to give birth to another generation of dumb single moms.
>>459 can reduce the spiciness of curry by blowing on it repeatedly.