INSTANT REVIEW: C
You can complain all you want, it's not going anywhere anytime soon.
INSTANT REVIEW: C++
You can complain all you want, it's not going anywhere anytime soon++.
INSTANT REVIEW: Java
Mediocre language for mediocre minds.
INSTANT REVIEW: Perl
After using it for eight years, I am still not halfway through learning it.
INSTANT REVIEW: Pascal
What good is it to design a language for learning and not for using?
INSTANT REVIEW: Modula-2
THIS IS JUST LIKE PASCAL, EXCEPT YOU HAVE TO SHOUT.
INSTANT REVIEW: Standard ML
People who majored in CS because they're too dumb for maths love this language.
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
A guy holding a gun to my head could make me write readable code too, but I wouldn't like that either.
INSTANT REVIEW: Visual Basic for Applications, Localized
I used this once, and I've been trying to forget it ever since.
INSTANT REVIEW: SQL
SQL is the COBOL of the nineties.
You forgot VB.NET.
... And C#.
But he didn't forget Poland. ;)
INSTANT REVIEW: PHP
Consistency? That's the hobgoblin of small minds. php.net/manual/ needs more traffic anyway.
PHP SUCKS.
>>14: Agreed.
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
A programming language developed in Japan which is known by ten Japanese people and ten thousand geeky American otaku who learned it solely because it is a programming language developed in Japan.
haha, GNAA is wapanese
>>17 gnaa.us is powered by PHP5. Team Barry on the otherhand, uses Ruby/PostgreSQL/NetBSD.
INSTANT REVIEW: mIRC SCRIPTING
Created to make the front end of some random IRC client have a bit more functionality, so then people went and made text editors, mp3 players, image viewers and web browsers and call themselves "coders".
[b]INSTANT REVIEW: HTML[/b]
It's not a language, doofus.
INSTANT REVIEW: BBCode
As dumb as the people who implement it and also not a language
INSTANT REVIEW: Javascript
A prototyping object based language that is a joy to use but is forever doomed to spend its years detecting browsers in web pages that insist on pixel-perfect CSS.
>>18 why did GNAA demand that 4chan admit ruby is awesome and port futallaby to it, then? :\
or maybe it was iichan, i forget
>>24
iichan used Wakaba and was never flooded (vericodes)
I was struggling to come up with something about Javascript. Thanks!
Could it be because they are a trolling organisation??
/INSTANT REVIEW: Lisp/
A language which mysteriously makes everyone who learns it sit around on IRC complaining about how every other language is worse than Lisp.
INSTANT REVIEW: WakabaMark
A language I can't remember how to use.
INSTANT REVIEW: Prolog
slow(prolog).
esoteric(prolog).
mostly_useless(X) :- esoteric(X), slow(X).
?- _
INSTANT REVIEW: BASIC
Older versions are better.
INSTANT REVIEW: Shell
echo "You must be looking for this: find /usr/ -name perl 2> /dev/null | grep "/usr/.*bin/perl" | sed -e "2~1d""
INSTANT REVIEW: Shell [correction]
echo "You must be looking for this: `find /usr/ -name perl 2> /dev/null | grep "/usr/.*bin/perl" | sed -e "2~1d"`"INSTANT REVIEW: Lua
Only game programmers use it.
INSTANT REVIEW: Forth
IS RPN SUPERIOR;
INSTANT REVIEW: perl
Simultaneously the best and worst write-only programming language.
INSTANT REVIEW: Javascript
I turned it off.
INSTANT REVIEW: Regular Expressions
I guess... I don't see why it has to be so complex. Check for an @, then check for at least one . after the @. I can't think of any valid, modern email addresses that break that.
The rules for what a valid email address are are much, much more strict and complex than that. You can do what you suggested, but you'll catch lots of addresses that are invalid, too. This is for making sure an address is strictly valid.
TECO called, and it wants its macros back (and some coffee).
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
owns
>>43 lacks funny.
INSTANT REVIEW: FORTRAN
Your parents dabbled with it in college so they say "know how computers work, stop talking down to me!"
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
My code actually looks pretty now! But I can't remember what it does anymore.
INSTANT REVIEW: TECO
[1 J^P$L$$
J <.-Z; .,(S,$ -D .)FX1 @F^B $K :L I $ G1 L>$$
INSTANT REVIEW: Whitespace
INSTANT REVIEW: Java
Sucks
>>50 is DQN
INSTANT REVIEW: VBScript
Some bright spark thought it would be cool to make VB's Very Bad syntax scriptable in a browser . sigh
ASP
SQL MArkup Language
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
Swiss Army Ballerina
INSTANT REVIEW: OCaml
(you (can (look (make it)(like lisp)) too));;
>>40 valid email addresses include "<>" and "justaname", they don't have @'s.
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
Things are automatically better if they're Japanese.
INSTANT REVIEW: Clean
When will... the hurting... stop
INSTAN REVIEW : PHP
<? for( ; ; ) ?> <?= "THis is PhP" ?>
>>59
shrug No worse than perl. And that example is too mundane. That's useless for the sake of it.
INSTANT REVIEW: Humourless Dunce
plz read >>60 4 info
INSTANT REVIEW: Java
InstantReview no62 = (new InstantReviewCreator(InstantReviewFactory.get())).newInstantReview()
INSTANT REVIEW: Perl
"#()%$/#"()=%/=")(/#%"$%?=)"#)$?=)"#?=¿!"($)="%?=$(%?(
>>59,62,63 are missing the point. This is not the write-one-line-of-made-up-code thread, it's the Instant Review thread.
>>62
no no no! You must follow established best practises down to the letter, everything else is wrong!
InstantReview no62 = InstantReviewBuilderFactory.getInstance().newInstantReviewBuilder().newInstantReview();
no62.setInstantReview("Just do what it says, don't think about it.");
> INSTANT REVIEW: Perl
> Star Trek for programmers.
Now THAT'S more like it!
INSTANT REVIEW: Dylan
LISP pretending to be C (and object-oriented.)
INSTANT REVIEW: .NET
= Same as Java - Platform Independence
INSTANT REVIEW: C# (sharrrp)
So that VB programmers can feel like real programmers. Also see >>67 >Java
INSTANT REVIEW: VB
GWBASIC without line numbers
INSTANT REVIEW: ObjectPAL
VBA with weirder syntax, basic regexp support, and more fatal crashes.
INSTANT REVIEW: C++
C--
INSTANT REVIEW: bash
you need me nomatter what the review!
INSTANT REVIEW: Objective-C
Smalltalk and C are great! Let's program in both of them at the same time!
Perl:
perl -e 'print map {(split(//))[0]} (q study abs, q chomp getc, q die bind, q lstat eval, q g u fag, q die bind, q lstat eval, q y u r gay, q wantarray qw, q y 4chan is gay, q crypt ungetc, q next warn, q eval time, q die bind, q keys break, q qw uniq)'
INSTANT REVIEW: Ada
Lets blow up the world!
INSTANT REVIEW: Java
NullPointerException
INSTANT REVIEW: >>81
GA
INSTANT REVIEW: Assembly Language
Kill yourself in 1001 easy steps.
INSTANT REVIEW: MATLAB
Vector math and DSP FTW!
INSTANT REVIEW: Applescript
Tell every reader of the post "Applescript" of the thread "Instant Reviews" of the board "Programming" of the site "4-ch" of the Internet : Making programming easy for morons makes it hard for programmers. End tell.
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
The bastard child of Smalltalk and Perl.
INSTANT REVIEW: VHDL
For something that depends on bit and bit_vector so much, it sure hates literal bit strings.
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
def __Too__ Many(self, Ugly):
"""Symbols"""INSTANT REVIEW: Brainfuck
>+++++++++[<++++++++>-]<.>+++++++[<++++>-]<+.+++++++..+++.[-]>++++++++[<++++>-]
<.#>+++++++++++[<+++++>-]<.>++++++++[<+++>-]<.+++.------.--------.[-]>++++++++[
<++++>-]<+.[-]++++++++++.
ITT we write in English as she is spoke.
INSTANT REVIEW: VB.NET
If YouAre.FuckingMoron = True Then
Kick.Self("InAss")ElseIf
Invest.Stocks("Google")EndIf
These are supposed to be instant reviews, not instant lame code samples.
btw, >>ElseIf
gg.
>>93
Those are reviews. Don't hate just because you can't be as witty as other people.
No, >>93 got it. This is not the "oh-so-clever pseudocode describes what the language" thread, this is the INSTANT REVIEW thread. Reviews are written in English. There's really not much that is witty about writing pseudocode. See >>65, and also see >>1-10,14,16,19-22,28-29,31,34-37,45-46,57,67 and so on.
Fucking prudes.
Why do people who don't get the jist of threads like this have to go and shit on them :(
INSTANT REVIEW: >>95
idiot