INSTANT REVIEW: C
You can complain all you want, it's not going anywhere anytime soon.
INSTANT REVIEW: C++
You can complain all you want, it's not going anywhere anytime soon++.
INSTANT REVIEW: Java
Mediocre language for mediocre minds.
INSTANT REVIEW: Perl
After using it for eight years, I am still not halfway through learning it.
INSTANT REVIEW: Pascal
What good is it to design a language for learning and not for using?
INSTANT REVIEW: Modula-2
THIS IS JUST LIKE PASCAL, EXCEPT YOU HAVE TO SHOUT.
INSTANT REVIEW: Standard ML
People who majored in CS because they're too dumb for maths love this language.
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
A guy holding a gun to my head could make me write readable code too, but I wouldn't like that either.
INSTANT REVIEW: Visual Basic for Applications, Localized
I used this once, and I've been trying to forget it ever since.
INSTANT REVIEW: SQL
SQL is the COBOL of the nineties.
INSTANT REVIEW: PHP
Consistency? That's the hobgoblin of small minds. php.net/manual/ needs more traffic anyway.
>>14: Agreed.
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
A programming language developed in Japan which is known by ten Japanese people and ten thousand geeky American otaku who learned it solely because it is a programming language developed in Japan.
INSTANT REVIEW: mIRC SCRIPTING
Created to make the front end of some random IRC client have a bit more functionality, so then people went and made text editors, mp3 players, image viewers and web browsers and call themselves "coders".
[b]INSTANT REVIEW: HTML[/b]
It's not a language, doofus.
INSTANT REVIEW: BBCode
As dumb as the people who implement it and also not a language
INSTANT REVIEW: Javascript
A prototyping object based language that is a joy to use but is forever doomed to spend its years detecting browsers in web pages that insist on pixel-perfect CSS.
/INSTANT REVIEW: Lisp/
A language which mysteriously makes everyone who learns it sit around on IRC complaining about how every other language is worse than Lisp.
INSTANT REVIEW: WakabaMark
A language I can't remember how to use.
INSTANT REVIEW: BASIC
Older versions are better.
INSTANT REVIEW: Lua
Only game programmers use it.
INSTANT REVIEW: Forth
IS RPN SUPERIOR;
INSTANT REVIEW: perl
Simultaneously the best and worst write-only programming language.
INSTANT REVIEW: Javascript
I turned it off.
INSTANT REVIEW: FORTRAN
Your parents dabbled with it in college so they say "know how computers work, stop talking down to me!"
INSTANT REVIEW: Python
My code actually looks pretty now! But I can't remember what it does anymore.
INSTANT REVIEW: Ruby
Things are automatically better if they're Japanese.