( ˃ Д˂) MITTENS SUCK!
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( ˃ Д˂) WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP POSTING THESE FUCKING ADDRESSES
( ˃ Д˂) I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY BECAUSE OF THE KOREANS
( ˃ Д˂) MY GIRLFRIEND KEEPS HURTING MY FACE!
( ˃ Д˂) I DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!
( ) I DON'T HAVE A FACE!
( ˃ Д˂) I DON'T HAVE A JOB NOR AMBITIONS!
( ˃ Д˂) I've been very sad lately fellow dokyuns, I wonder if someone will ever acknowledge my feelings and lend a helping hand - Sigh...
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Uhm, something that people don't necessarily know I do is write poetry. And, uh, I'd like to give one a bash. I mostly write it for, you know, a sort of therapy, to get some feelings off my chest. Anyway this is a poem about anger. It's called 'Angry', or, in brackets, (feet).
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Sometimes I get a bit angry, but you couldn't tell, no you couldn't tell, unless you looked real closely. Sometimes I get a bit angry, but it's alright, yes, it's alright because I keep it out of sight, inside.. deep.. inside.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) I was breastfed until I was nine. Breastfed til I was nine.. til I was nine.. Which my
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..doctor says is fine. And he also says I deal with anger better if I wrote about myself in a poem or a letter. My mother was a
( ˃ Д˂) STUPID BITCH!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..caring lady. She taught me all I know, although I was a little slow, she never gave up, she never let me SLUT down. Although she spent a lot of time at the neighbour's house when my dad was out of town.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) I didn't walk til I was 7 or talk til I was 10 but neither did Napoleon according to my
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..doctor, who has certificates in frames to substantiate his
( ˃ Д˂) DODGY FUCKING
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..claims. My father left my mother for the love of a
( ˃ Д˂) POONTANG!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) And I have a b-
( ˃ Д˂) BASTARD!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..brother who I've never really known because my dad moved up to Queensland and he doesn't have a
( ˃ Д˂) BULLSHIT, YOU FAT FUCK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..telephone. In primary school I had trouble making
( ˃ ヮ˂) ASHTRAYS!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..friends. An issue which has become somewhat of a trend, the origin of which I can not pretend as not perplex me. Although my
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..doctor says it's cool and that loads of
( ˃ Д˂) FAT PRICK!
( ˃ Д˂) SHUT UP I'M NOT FAT!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..kids at school have problems with communication and that of course medication would be wise and combined with more honest self-expression could help me with my issues with emotional repression. And at a 180 bucks a session, I think I'll take the
( ˃ Д˂) THIEVING QUACK BASTARD!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..chap's advice. So, I quite like
( ˃ Д˂) PORN!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..photography.. and books on
( ˃ Д˂) GUNS!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..history. And I'd like to be a
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) POLITICIAN!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..vet. And I find that as I get older and more in control of my violent tendencies and when I die
( ˃ Д˂) KILL!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..d-die, I'll have no regrets. And I feel that all this writing is really
( ˃ Д˂) PUFFY!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..exciting. And my
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..m-my
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) DOCTOR would be proud because I feel a lot less angry and I'm saying stuff out loud and I'm letting anger out. Like today in our last session when I taught the
( ˃ Д˂) QUACK!
( ﾟ -ﾟ) a lesson, cause he said I'm not progressing, said I wasn't moving forward so I said..
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Well let's see how you move without your fucking legs.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) And I tied him to his chair and I pulled out my machete and I listened to him beg and then I cut his fucking feet off. While he lay there bleeding, I used his feet..
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..to kick him in the head.
>I was breastfed until I was nine.
( ﾟ -ﾟ) ..
( ﾟ -ﾟ) lucky fuck
DQN you're so fucking cute and sweet
( ˃ Д˂) NOW I'M MOST DEPRESSED AND SAD WHERE I ONCE WAS BLITHE AND GLAD
( ˃ Д˂) I COULD TRIP ABOUT THE TOWN BOTH TRIM AND NEATLY
( ˃ Д˂) I WAS HAPPY NIGHT AND MORN BUT FROM ALL SUCH JOYS I'M SHORN
( ˃ Д˂) SINCE I FELL SO DEEP IN LOVE WITH SALLY WHEATLEY
( ˃ Д˂) AND IT'S AH DEAR ME WHAT AM I GAN TO DAE
( ˃ Д˂) SALLY STOLE AWAY MY HEART COMPLETELY
( ˃ Д˂) AND I'LL NEVER GET IT BACK FOR SHE GANS WITH MR BLACK
( ˃ Д˂) AND THEY SAY HE'S GOING TO MARRY SALLY WHEATLEY！！！！！
( ˃ Д˂) I'M TIRED OF EVERY INTERNET COMMUNITY SUCCUMBING TO IDIOCY
( ˃ Д˂) “INTERNET COMMUNITY” DOES NOT EXIST WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) Half of PHP being HURR DEPRECATED and DURR OBSOLETE every few versions because it's trying to be something it wasn't designed to be.
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) shoehorning a 15+ year-old video game that was designed for software rendering into an OpenGL port and making it look WORSE in the process
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) PEOPLE USING THIS FUCKING THING OVER ( ˃ Д˂)
( ˃ Д˂) BUTT ITCH!!!
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) SCREW THAT WHINY CRY BABY FACE! I WANT TO USE THE ONE THAT'S SO ANGRY HE'S ABOUT TO BLOW A BLOOD VESSEL!
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) SPESS MEHREENS ARE ALWAYS ANGRY ALL THE TIME
I'M SO ANGRY I'M INCOHERENT, BADGER CUNT DICKS BITCH SHITCOCK GAR GAR GAR
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) INJURING MY PENIS DURING MASTURBATION
( ˃ Д˂) TALKING POO HATS PISS ME OFF!!!
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) I WORK IN A FACTORY BUT I'M THE YOUNGEST PERSON THERE SO THEY TREAT ME LIKE I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING WHEN IN REALITY I'VE BEEN THERE LONGER THAN A LOT OF THESE OTHER PEOPLE.
( ˃ Д˂) I'VE BEEN WORKING IN FACTORIES ALL MY LIFE BUT THIS YOUNG UPSTART THINKS HE KNOWS MORE THAN ME JUST BECAUSE I'M NEW AT THIS FACTORY
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) FACE SELECTION WAR! GRR! SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE STARRING NICHOLAS CAGE!
( ˃ Д˂) NICHOLAS CAGE SU-
actually I usually enjoy his performances.
this is funny
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) >>233 FAILED TO POST A HEADSHOT!! IMMA BREAKKA YOUR FACE!!!
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) I MISSPELLED MY CAPTCHA. GOD FUCKING NIGGER LICKING PUSSY TITS!
( ˃ Д˂) WHY THE FUCK CAN'T I FIND DQN ELECTRONICS VOL 10?????
( ˃ Д˂) WHY MUST THE DQN ELECTRONICS GUYS USE THIS THREAD FOR THEIR SELF-PROMOTION?????
( ˃ Д˂) WHY DID I HAVE TO GO AND INTRODUCE (╬ ಠ益ಠ) TO THIS THREAD NOW THERE'S AN ARGUMENT ABOUT HIM HE JUST WANTS TO EXPRESS HIMSELF YOU KNOW
( ˃ Д˂) STOP ASKING "WHY" QUESTIONS THERE'S ALREADY A THREAD FOR THAT YOU MENTAL MIDGETS!
( ˃ Д˂) THAT WHORE WITH THE BOUNCY TITS JUST FLIPPED ME OFF!
( ˃ Д˂) HAVING OVER FIVE DOLLARS WORTH OF USELESS CANADIAN COINS LEFT OVER AFTER USING A COINSTAR MACHINE!
( ˃ Д˂) MY FUCKING ANKLES HURT GODDAMMIT
( ˃ Д˂) MY GODDAMN TOE HURTS LIKE FUCK AMD I JUST LOST ON TOEHOE.
( ˃ Д˂) IKAMUSUME IS DELAYED
MY BIRTHDAY WHISKY'S ALMOST RAN OUT AND I'VE BEEN BIRTHED FOR FIVE MONTHS NOW
( ´ヮ`) <3 mittens
( ˃-Д-) GUUUUYYYYYS!
( ˃ Д˂) That better be ANGRY SEX!!!
( <д>) also, isn't Mittens a girl?
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Thanks >>253, but I'm still angry.
( ˃ Д˂) FICK MEIN LEBEN.FICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICKFICK DICH.
( ˃ Д˂) I CAN'T GET MYSELF BANNED FROM 4CHAN BECAUSE I ALREADY AM BANNED FROM 4CHAN!!!!!
( ˃ Д˂) WHY DID I CLICK ON A LINK TO E621.NET AJDHFJKHFSJFLKAHSDJFLLJKFHA FUUUUUUUUUCK
( ˃ Д˂) I can't get away with beating/stabbing some worthless piece of shit to death! HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY STOLEN TV BACK?!
( ˃ Д˂) I WAS GOING TO VOTE THE STRAIGHT DEMOCRATIC TICKET BUT I GOT FUCKING MUGGED AND THE COPS NEVER FOUND THE BASTARD SO I'M VOTING REPUBLICAN FROM NOW ON OUT OF SHEER HATE!!!!!
( ˃ Д˂) I have semen in my sinuses.
( ˃ Д˂) 3D MODELING PACKAGES THAT DON'T SUPPORT ACCURACY TO AT LEAST SIX DECIMAL PLACES!!
( ˃ Д˂)LIKE MODO!!!!!!!
( ˃ Д˂) CHEAP MILK THAT TASTES LIKE SHIT! LITERALLY!
( ˃ Д˂) giquution? WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF CAPTCHA IS THAT?
( ˃ Д˂) BOOKS TYPESET WITH MICROSOFT WORD!
( ˃ Д˂) ANYTHING TO DO WITH MICROSOFT WORD!
( ˃ Д˂) GOING TO A STREET FAIR WITH ONLY FOUR DOLLARS IN MY WALLET!
( ˃ Д˂) THERE ARE OVER TEN THREADS I LIKE ON DQN, BUT I CAN'T KEEP THEM ALL ON THE FRONT PAGE!
( ˃ Д˂) I NEED TO POOP, BUT DON'T WANT TO LEAVE MY SEAT! THESE ARE MY BEST PANTS, TOO!
( ˃ Д˂) MY CAR HAS MAJOR ENGINE PROBLEMS AND IT HAS LESS THAN 100,000 MILES!
( ˃ Д˂) http://www.fchan.us
( ˃ Д˂) I'M NOTICING ALL THE POSTS ABOUT FURRIES WAY MORE THAN I PROBABLY SHOULD!
( ˃ Д˂) I DIDN'T NOTICE ALL THE POSTS ABOUT FURRIES UNTIL >>270 POINTED THEM OUT!
( ˃ Д˂) FUCK YOU AND EVERYONE WHO LOOKS LIKE YOU!!
( ˃ Д˂) THAT DOG WILL NOT SHUT THE FUCK UP AND MY MOM WANTS ME TO SHOOT IT
( ˃ Д˂) IT'S NOT THE DOG'S FAULT IT'S A COCK BUT I DO WANT TO SHOOT THE NEIGHBORS WHO DON'T TAKE GOOD CARE OF THEIR DOG
( ﾟ -ﾟ) Responsible owners don't let their dogs bark all day. It's a behavioral thing that an owner can fix.
( ˃ Д˂) JESUS FUCK THERE IT GOES AGAIN
( ˃ Д˂) I WANT TO LISTEN TO A SONG ON YOUTUBE BUT I CAN ONLY FIND TWO VERSIONS--THE "VEVO" VERSION THAT NEVER LOADS AND JUST SPINS THE "LOADING" ANIMATION FOREVER, AND THE SQUEAKY-VOICED TEENAGE PRAT TRYING TO DO A "COVER" VERSION WITH HIS DA'S GUITAR, THREE CHORDS, AND A LEATHER JACKET BUT NEGLECTED TO PUT "I HAVE NO DETECTABLE TALENT" IN THE DESCRIPTION! GRAAAAAAAHHHH
( ˃ Д˂) WHY DO PEOPLE THINK YOUTUBE IS AN ACCEPTABLE PLACE TO GO TO LISTEN TO MUSIC?
( ˃ Д˂) >>268 didn't change his oil frequently enough and generally take care of his properly.
( ˃ Д˂) THAT DAMNED ROOM IN SUPER METROID WHERE YOU HAVE TO WALL JUMP TO GET OUT
( ˃ Д˂) YOU'RE ALL FUCKING YELLING AND I HAVE A HEADACHE.
( ˃ Д˂) WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! IS IT MY INTERNET THAT SUCKS SHIT OR IS IT THE FUCKING SERVER FOR FUCKING BRAWL? I JUST WANT TO FIGHT PEOPLE AND BEAT THEM TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF, BUT IT LAGS SO MUCH OR I GET TOLD THAT THE PLAYERS WERE DISCONNECTED FROM ME! FUCK!
( ˃ 益˂) WHY IS IT CALLED SHONEN SUNDAY IF IT COMES OUT ON WEDNESDAY!?!?!?!?!!!
( ˃ Д˂) BECAUSE THEY SHARE A LOVE OF MITTENS AND YOU DON'T, ARE YOU BLIND GODDAMNIT?
∠､( ˃ Д˂ ),､ゝ WHY DID I LISTEN TO >>288?! I AVOIDED MEETING
WITH MY FRIENDS TODAY! IN THE END, I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING
CREATIVE NOR PRODUCTIVE. I COULDN'T EVEN TYPE A SINGLE LINE OF
CODE INTO MY COMPUTER ‼
HOWEVER, I LEARNED A LOT ABOUT HISTORY OF ISRAEL, BECAUSE I...
I WAS READING THAT FUCKING WIKIPEDIA ALL DAY LONG AFTER READING
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laser-guided_bomb ‼
DON'T FUCKING CLICK ON A FUCKING "OSIRAK" THERE OR YOU MIGHT END
UP SPENDING YOUR TIME AS WELL AS I DID!
( ˃ Д˂) FUCKING WASPS WHATS THEIR PROBLEM? JUST LEAVE ME FUCKING ALONE, WHY MUST YOU IMMEDIATELY ATTACK ME WHEN I COME INTO YOUR VIEW. STOP FLYING IN MY GOD DAMN WINDOW!!
(╬ ಠ益ಠ) THE PAGE YOU REQUESTED WAS TOO LARGE TO TRANSLATE!!
( ˃ Д˂) ESPRESSO IS MADE VIA TIME APPLIED TO COFFEE AND WATER BUT IT TAKES TOO LONG
( ˃ Д˂) WHY DID VIP UPLOADER HAVE TO DIE, I'M STILL PISSED ABOUT THAT
( ˃ Д˂) NO ONE PLAYS HOMEBREW SNES GAMES ANYMORE THAT I KNOW OF
( ˃ Д˂) SOMEONE UPDATE THE HOWARD BEALE RANT FOR THE INTERNET
( ˃ Д˂) WHO THE HELL DOES NICK DENTON THINK HE IS, ANWAY
( ˃ Д˂) NICE JOB TRANSLATING DRAGON WARRIOR SIX! YOU LEFT A BUNCH OF STRINGS OUT! YOU'RE FIRED!
>( ˃ Д˂) SOMEONE UPDATE THE HOWARD BEALE RANT FOR THE INTERNET
∠､( ˃ Д˂ ),､ゝ I UPDATED IT ONCE NOT JUST FOR THE INTERNET BUT FOR YOSHINOYA. I FOUND IT TO BE SO NEAT THAT I SAVED IT IN MY COPYPASTA-THAT-NEVER-GOT-POSTED-ON-THE-WEB TEXT FILE, BUT NOW IT'S GONE. I CAN'T FIND IT ANYWHERE. IT WAS THE BEST TEXT FILE EVER. THE BEST, I'M TELLING YOU. THE HUMOR IN IT WAS SO BRILLIANT THAT IT WOULD BE DANGEROUS TO UPLOAD IT ALL AT ONCE. HOWEVER, IT'S NO LONGER POSSIBLE.
∠､( ˃ Д˂ ),､ゝ IT ALSO HAD A UNICODE CHARACTER THAT LOOKED SOMEWHAT SIMILAR TO APERTURE SCIENCE LOGO. IT WAS IN THE SAME FUCKING FILE. AND SINCE PORTAL 2 IS OUT, I'D BE THE RADDEST KID ON WWW/STEAM OR WWW/DQN IF I PUT IT RIGHT INTO MY NICKNAME AND THEN PRETEND THAT EVERYTHING I SAY IS PRERECORDED.
On the other hand, Howard Beale's rant applies perfectly to everything without any need to adapt it.
( ಠДಠ) Why are all you people posting in all caps? That makes me angry.
( ˃ Д˂) I HATE MY JOB GODDAMNIT
( ˃ Д˂) GEORGE MASON UNIVERSITY ADMISSIONS DEPARTMENT, YOU REJECTED A STUDENT WITH A 3.6 GPA AND FRANKLY I'M GETTING PRETTY SICK OF YOUR SHIT. IN-STATE TUITION IS NOT WORTH THIS.
（ ・∀・） I had sex earlier today, and I also sold a sculpture I made for $520 two days ago. things are going pretty well.
∠､( ˃ Д˂ ),､ゝ WHY DON'T YOU HAVE SEX FOR $520 IF YOU ARE SO SUCCESSFUL ‼
( ˃ ヮ˂) ESPEON IS FUNNY
( ˃ Д˂) WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU CALL IT "DRAGON WARRIOR" IF IT'S "DRAGON QUEST" YOU INBRED MONGREL
( ˃ Д˂) WHY DID ALL MY POSSESSIONS DISAPPEAR FROM MY DORM ROOM GODDAMMIT I CAN'T EVEN MAKE A CUP OF TEA OR SOME HOT CHOCOLATE NOW
( ˃ Д˂) I WAS UP AND TRAVELING FOR EIGHTEEN HOURS TODAY AND I'M SO TIRED BUT I HAVE SOME TESTS IN THE MORNING FOR WHICH I'M NOT PREPARED FFFFFFFFFFF--